Empaths

Being an empath can be difficult.  Especially more so if you do not realise you are an empath.

The definition of an empath in the Oxford dictionary is, ‘a person with the paranormal ability to perceive the mental or emotional state of another individual.’

Some people associate empaths with having hyper sensitive personalities.  Although the traits can be very similar, an empath is able to pick up on the feelings and emotions of others very quickly.  Sometimes without noticing, they take on these same emotions as their own.  Often they do not know why their feelings have switched so quickly.  From one moment feeling ok, the next to feeling really low, or really hyper, depending on the emotions of the other.

Empaths often become sponges to other peoples emotions.  When empaths are around other positive people, they pick up on these emotions and this is great.  However when around people who are depressed, they can find themselves being drained of energy, and feeling low themselves.

For empaths it can be difficult to distinguish their emotions and feelings from other peoples.  This can be difficult to deal with, as often in times the empaths feeling will hit a low, in a second, and they may not be aware of why.  This is more commonly true, when the person does not realise they are an empath.

Empaths often like to spend time alone.  This is when they can decompress their emotions, and feel their own emotions.  Empaths often do not build their own boundaries, which is what allows the taking on of other peoples emotions.

Once you identify yourself as an empath, you are able to take the steps to protect your inner emotions and not suck in all of the emotions around them.  One important things empaths need to do is learn to separate their emotions from others.  Being an empath can be very overwhelming and emotionally draining at times.  They often find it difficult to be in crowds.

When you feel overridden with emotion and don’t know why, you need to ask yourself the questions, what emotion am I feeling?  is it my emotion? if so, what is causing me to feel this way?

Empaths often end up with addictions, including drug, alcohol or sex addictions.  This is how they are able to block the emotions the feelings they frequently found themselves over ridden with.

It is very important for empaths to practice self love, and look after themselves.  When we are able to do this, it automatically creates a boundary, this allows us to protect ourselves more, and not be so open for others as an emotional dumping ground.  When you start to neglect yourself emotionally and physically, that is when we allow others emotions to be mixed up with our own.

Once we practice self care, it allows us to feel more of ourselves and our feelings, which makes us able to differentiate our feelings and emotions from others easier.  Once empaths practice self care, it allows them to let go of the feelings they have taken on from others.

Often with empaths, they believe if everyone around them is ok they will feel ok.  It is important to realise as an empath, where your emotion ends, and what you have picked up from someone else.

For empaths, being in relationships can also feel very difficult, they often take on the others emotions but do not realise.  They often over think situations and take any disagreements or fallouts they may have had upon themselves and believe it was all or their fault.  This is because they are able to identify so closely with the feeling of the other.  However, this in turn means, that we often ignore our own feelings.

I remember myself, when I was with an ex-partner, when we would have a falling out, I would often over think the situation, the contributing factors and believe it was all my fault.  I remember, I used to feel that it was better for me to feel the negative emotions. The thought of someone else going through these feelings, made me feel awful.  It felt easier for me to take on all the negativity as I could not handle the guilt of someone else feeling that way.  This left me open to receiving all negativity from others, and to a certain extent I turned myself into a emotional punching bag.

Alongside that, because I was too caught up in others and how they felt, I would often ignore my own gut feelings and go along with another persons wanting.  This was so I did not need to feel the guilt, of the other person not getting what they want.  As you can imagine this in turn left me with a number of difficult emotions within myself that I found difficult to deal with or let go of.

I found myself in many different situations, where I would over analyse my actions, and would after regret not following my gut feeling, to spare the other persons feelings.  The difficult things empaths face is, if they push their own feelings, we often take on the feelings of the person we feel we have let down.  So even though we have followed our gut, we can not stop the negative feeling within ourselves.

This is another reason it is important for empaths to put up their own boundaries, and to practice self love, so they have more of a sense of themselves.  Empaths will also pick up on the feelings of others and their first instinct will be to want to help.  When an empath is unable to help the other person they often find it difficult to deal with the feelings they conjure up inside, as they feel helpless, and can not handle knowing another person is feeling a certain way.

As empaths we need to come to the realisation that although we can help others, we also need to put ourselves and our own emotions first.  If we do not do this, we often get lost in the emotions around us, and find it difficult to identify our emotions from others.

One way for empaths to ground themselves is by meditating, this allows us to listen a reconnect with our own intuition.  The more and more we practice this, we will notice the feeling of our own intuition become stronger the more we practice.

Empaths are often seen as emotionally strong people, and we are naturally.  However, what others do not understand is that, whilst we wear the smile on our faces, and are listening to others and their problems, inside sometimes we can be in total chaos because we are taking in the sadness and emotion around us.  Us empaths would never let this on, as we would not want the other person to feel the guilt of what was happening inside us.

Thank you for taking the time to read my post, I hope you find this helpful 🙂 xx

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